Probably, your chocolate fountain is broken too

BA should have scheduled the grand opening of Terminal 5 for 1 April, since - to nobody’s great surprise - it’s been a joke. Personally I like a joke, but not when people have to pay for the privilege of being the butt of the joke in question. The front page of the British Airways website has this prominent sign:

This is very moving - that plane looks positively distraught as it turns away from our accusing eyes - but it’s not entirely clear what they’re sorry for. Are they merely sorry for the inconvenience to passengers, a casual expression of solidarity which extends as far as a 260×140 pixel graphic on their website? Or are they more deeply sorry - perhaps filled with sorrow at being so utterly incompetent - an existential cry for forgiveness from the gods of aviation?

Willie Walsh, BA’s Chief Executive (but not for long *cough*), had this to say:

We are sorry for the disruption and inconvenience caused to customers whose flights have been cancelled or whose bags have been delayed.

Question answered. Slap a graphic on the website and pray those 400 “volunteers” show up to sort the 15,000 bags we’ve got in “temporary storage”. The gods of aviation can suck my - I’m sorry, is this microphone still on?

What burns me up is that the chaos at T5 may jeopardise the chocolate fountain that I was promised by Executive Club Manager Sarah Keyes in a personal email to me. Let me add that this was only the latest in the long string of personal emails that we have exchanged, and leave it there. Never let it be said that I allow my personal feelings to affect my harsh but fair judgment on the affairs of man.